| i don't know what to do.... |
[Mar. 18th, 2005|01:34 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  annoyed | ] |
okay back to my story. well, kyle and i are friends and everything. and i will always care about him. well, he wants me to go to prom w/ him. and i told drew i'd go w/ him. and now i don't know who to go w/. i don't want to hurt either of them. so, i thought i'd just go w/ chelsea. and i told kyle during lunch today. and he FLIPPED. literally saying i was stupid and shit. so, now i don't know what to do. grr! i want to go w/ a guy. but i don't know. i have a feeling kyle will change his mind and not go if i decide to go w/ him. and i don't want to tell drew i don't want to go w/ him because he is too sweet to hurt. i hate this so much. i've been thinking about this for the past two days. i just need to figure out what im doing and figure it out soon.
off all that...
yesterday i went home chilled for a while. made some yummy chocolate pudding! mmmmm... then i went tanning and went to Karly's. we went to town and got her pictures and a poster board. we seen ash, marg, and paige @ wal*mart. then karly and i went to 3 amigos. it was good. after that we went tanning. i went tanning 2 yesterday. is that bad for you? the bed i went in though was this person's from my work and the bed was really small and it wasn't hot at all so i know it didn't work.
Today I have to go tanning after school and then off to work. Tonight who know's what will happen. Ashley S. was talking to me in the hall after lunch about going to margie's and then to Eric's. I guess we*ll find out what were doing. I have to be at work sat @ 8 for a meeting. Then I have to work that day @ 4. Well, I guess I'm going to go...*:) |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 18th, 2005|12:57 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | annoyed | ] |
i don't know what to do. seriously. life is always so hard for me. i'm always in some drama it feels like. but i guess it's my fault. me & drew broke up. i felt it was best we'd just be friends because of everything w/ kyle. A lot has happened since I wrote in here. Kyle's been spreading rumors and stuff. But were friends now...gotta go work talk later! |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 17th, 2005|08:11 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  blank | ] |
i don't know what to do...im so confused w/ everything. yesterday i didn't go to school. I was suppose to ride to school w/ kyle but we wound up not going. I didn't feel good. we went and got breakfast before we went home and guess who was there...DREW!* yikes. kyle started flipping and wanted drew to see me & him together to get him mad. Drew seen and yes he got mad. He thought I didn*t go to school to be w/ kyle all day. and he told people that. Lots of drama...long story i gotta go....about to get in trouble im in macs! |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 10th, 2005|10:37 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  bored | ] |
yesterday i hung out w/ Drew. He took me tanning after school then we went to his house and watched a movie w/ david and lindsey. i fell asleep! hehe! i was tried. we were suppose to go to youth but we didn't. david, drew, lindsey and i all went to papa john's and got pizza. it was so GoOd!*:)
Then we chilled and Lindsey and I studied. Then Drew took me home. On my road he let me drive his car. I*m not good at driving a stick. but it was fun. Then i went home and then i went to bed after I talked to drew!:)*
Biology exam wasn't bad. I hope I did good. I need to do good. Today I don't work. I have to go tanning then I don't know what I*ll do. Guess I*ll go! later!* |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 8th, 2005|08:20 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | sick | ] |
i haven't wrote in here in a while. and a lot of stuff has happened and i can't remember it all. well, me and my friends have had a lot of disagreements lately. karly and i aren't friends right now because of a guy. which is stupid. and margie and i ...i dunno we seem to be okay. but i did something stupid. i didn't mean to do what i did. but im sick of people putting things on me and making me feel like its my fault. long story. but i hate all this. i hate drama. and i REALLY wish we could all get a long.
kyle and i have recently been friends. and im fine w/ that. i started talking to drew. people have def. had something to say about that. but i DON*T CARE! he is so sweet to me. and we get a long good. and to me that's all that matters. we go out now. he asked me out last weekend. and he left me this sweet little message on my car. it made me happy. yesterday me and lindsey went to va. to look at prom dresses for me. she found this really pretty one for me. and i love it. im so exicted about prom.......:) i hope it goes well. today i have to work. which is a good thing bekuz im so BROKE....and gas went up. i hate that. i usually get a half of tank for 5-6 dollars....and now i'm getting nothing. grrr! me and lindsey got lost in va. i took the wrong exit. i ALWAYS do that. then lindsey found our way back...and i took the wrong exit again...hahaha! it was fun though. finally we found our way back thanks to Lindsey. On our way home we stopped at Hardee's I had to show Kyle my prom dress. Then we went to see David. And then we went to Lindsey's....and chilled w/ drew!! it was overall a fun day... i have to go mrs. mac wants me studying for 9 weeks exams!* |
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| i can't believe he did this..... |
[Feb. 22nd, 2005|08:16 am] |
lately i've been talking to kyle. i've been keeping it from everyone because I didn't want anyone to know. I've been crying a lot and missing him like crazy. So, we've hung out ever chance we got....and this started friday. i cryed in front of him so much...its crazy. well, last night i had to work. and kyle didn't go to school so i didn't see him all day. he called me soon as school got out. and everything was okay. then i talk to him while i was at work. margie, karly, ashley, and lj come to little caesar's. and i got off work then margie and lj and I drove around. Later on we meet up w/ Karly and Ashley at 3 amigo's. We had no money bekuz we left it in the car so we asked if we could wash dishes and the mexican's said yes=)** it was so much fun. us four (me, karly, marige, & ashley) back there washing dishes. The mexican's took pictures of us the whole time. And they took one of our butts...yikes!!* well, i stop at work to get my phone charger and while i was there kyle calls. And he seemed okay i told him to call me on my cell that i just had to run in and get something. well, he calls me and he's fucked up. he had been drinking w/ willie. then willie yells he fucked kelly. i was like wtf. and kyle was like no i didn't. well, he did...and i never want to talk to him again. i can't believe he would do that. when he calls her a nasty hoe and stuff. well, good luck to both of them...* |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 21st, 2005|08:44 am] |
yesterday was fun. me & margie went to va. to look at prom dresses. I seen some real cute ones at all the rage. we ran into kari, courtney and page. And we seen Jessica g. she was working. the dresses were really expensive & they made my hips look really big..and my boobs look so SMALL!...it made me sad. I didn't find anything that really caught my eye so I have to keep looking. On the way home me and margie got lost. it was so funny. and we almost ran out of gas...so we took some exit and it got us really lost. but w/ margie's nagivation skills we made it home. we got some stuff from target. we got this little thing to put our make up in. we got some make up. and i got some shoes. their tan & their high heals ...i <3 em! Today I have to go to work & tanning. *:) |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 18th, 2005|02:10 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  confused | ] |
yesterday was fun... i chilled w/ crystal..we chilled w/ some people for a little bit and then went to margies. i talked to kyle....he was being nice. but ne ways. me and crystal went to margie's ...crystal got ready. then me and margie drove around. met up w/ rob and the boys. then we drove....and went to the school for the game. we got in for free...got free food..and a free drink. after the game i drove margie home and headed home. this morining i had court. i got my ticket dropped. i was so happy. i talked to the DA. I told them I got a ticket for "failure to yield at a stop sign" ....they said it was dropped and i didn't have to pay anything. yaya. then i went to school. im in 6th now. about 30 minutes left of school then off to work. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 17th, 2005|01:41 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  amused | ] |
today is going okay... crystal and i are hanging out after school. we have plans and hopefully they*ll work out. today is margie's first day of work... i hope she likes it!..and i think it's ljs too! i might go visit them. crystal and i got invinted to go eat at 3 amigos w/ casey, lyd, ash, preston, and colleen. i dunno if were going though. tonight we have a game ...i might make an appearance...it depends on how everything goes. gotta go bell*later |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 16th, 2005|08:22 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | curious | ] |
today consist of hanging out w/ Crystal & Tiffany after school... forgetting to pick up my niece after school...then going to get her.
Driving around...getting something to eat...
dropping crystal and tiffany off. then going to tiffany (my niece) house...cleaning up her room. talkin to seth. then me and tiff went to town cleaned out my car. then i dropped her off. and went to chill w/ margie for a while. now im home just chilling.. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 15th, 2005|08:03 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | chipper | ] |
sunday was crazy. kyle started all this shit at my work. we had to call the cops. yikes. my heart was beating soOO fast. i was so nervous. i just wanted to cry right then and there. but i held myself together. and it's over once again. i need to just leave him a lone...why can't i? why is it so hard? i wish i was as strong as some as my friends...but im not.
Monday was good. School was fine.. Valentine's sucked for me. No boyfriend:( it*ll be okay. after school me and crystal went to wal*mart. we were suppose to go tanning but we didn't we drove around before i had to go to work. then i went to work. i left around 7 and went to my sisters. then i went home talked to some people and went to bed.
now im at margies.. we had a delay! later |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 13th, 2005|12:16 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | mad* | ] |
| [ | music |
| | fuck you--some song off amanda's cd | ] |
this weekend has been interesting. friday i went to the dance. kyle bought me roses! i was so happy. they were so pretty*:) the dance was okay. Boring actually. no one was there. it wasn't that bad though. Kyle and I left real early and went to get taco bell. that was great! yum yum! I was suppose to spend the night at Tiffany's after the dance but i didn't. kyle and i had had a fight and i just really needed some time w/ him. So, we went to his house after we got taco bell and we watched "The Notebook"... i hadn't seen it yet. I LOVED IT !! i cried lots. i wish i had love like that. I wish kyle and i had no problems and everything was perfect. and everytime i think things are great...something gets fucked up. but anyways im so glad i got to see the movie w/ him than anyone else. he fell asleep a little not bekuz he thought it was boring but it was late. but i think he overall liked it. and i hope he did. it was wonderful. i fell asleep at kyle's and at 3 his mom woke us up and i left.
this morining i met up w/ my sister and niece and went got something to eat at sonic. then we went shopping my sister bought me a pink fossil wallet and a pink sweater for valentine's. i love the wallet so much. its so cute!!!:) Then my niece and I caught a movie. We seen "Hitch". it was cute. I got free popcorn, candy, and a drunk. dut dut!:) hehehe. andy and brandon hooked it up. kyle called and told me he was going to come visit me at work....he never showed up. i called his house and his mom didn't know where he was. i was so pissed. then he called at 9 to see if i wanted to come over after work and i was like no. and hung up. he was pissing me off. he made up some bullshit story about brock or something and that's why he couldn't come see me. it's okay for him to ditch me but not for me to ditch him. well fuck that shit. he*ll see it don't work that way. and 2marrow im not hanging out w/ his ass either. i have to work at 4 so ill spend time w/ my friends and then off to work.
today i worked w/ amanda it was fun. i didn't work front counter that much...nate worked for me. i really don't enjoy working front counter. anyways....amanda and i both got off at 10 so we drove around to buy time before she got up w/ heather and britney. now im home just chating to brittany b. online and thinking. i*m so stoked i took a lot of pictures and im going to get them back. i can't wait:) i love some pictures. well, i guess im done ...night:) |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 11th, 2005|08:33 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  giddy | ] |
yesterday i had off. i left school at 2:30 because I had an otho. appointment. the otho. got mad because I lost my retainers. and one of my teeth moved....but you can't even tell. After that I went to wal*mart I had to get a few things. And then I went to Burger King and got something to eat. I hung out w/ Kyle after for a while.
This morining was fun. Kyle and Melissa rode w/ me to school. I danced on the way to Britney Spears. Me & Melissa have a dance for "Stronger". It was funny. Tonight is the dance. I'm exicted but nervous. I have a feeling it's going to be boring. but we*ll see. I'm going to pick up my niece after school...drop off kyle and me and lolly & others are going to get ready. I hope I look cute. I have an idea for my hair and I hope it works. My sister brought me some cute dresses this morining. I have to decide which one i'm going to wear. I really don't like wearing dresses....but I think I want to tonight. Well, I guess I'm going to go...:) Hope everyone has a good weekend! |
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| things feel different.......... |
[Feb. 9th, 2005|01:23 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  anxious | ] |
everything feels so different. sittin next to seth in 5th. i feel so awkard. its crazy. and before we dated we got a long good. and it seems like now we don't. maybe its my fault. i dunno.
kyle and i have hung out lately. he's being really nice. but im scared as always. get my heart broken...once again. and everyone's trying to keep me away from him. and i completely understand why.
but its like i can't be away from him. he is a HUGE part of my life. and always will be rather im with him or not.
yesterday i didn't have to work. i took a nap...chilled w/ melissa...and drove to moyock and visited kyle @ work. today i do have to work. i can't wait until i can eat some italin cheese bread. i love that stuff so much! yummmm! i left my clothes for work @ home so kyle's going to take me home first.
this weekend consist of going to the dance w/ my friends and kyle. and working. tons of fun! well, im going to go... later!*
ps---kate & scottie i love yall's haircut! super cute!******** |
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| i love this song:) |
[Feb. 4th, 2005|08:51 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  awake | ] |
If you see him, tell him I wish him well.
How am I doing?
Well sometimes it's hard to tell.
I still miss him more than ever.
But please don't say a word.
If you see him.
If you see him.
If you see her, tell her I'm doing fine.
And if you want to, say that I think of her from time to time.
Ask her if she ever wonders where we both went wrong.
If you see her.
If you see her.
Oh, I still want her.
And I still need him so.
Oh, I don't know why we let each other go.
If you see her, tell her the light's still on, for her.
Nothing's changed, deep down the fire still burns, for him.
And even if it takes forever, say I'll still be here.
If you see him.
If you see her.
If you see him.
If you see her. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 4th, 2005|08:22 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | scared | ] |
yesterday i didn't have to work...they did call me into work but i didn't go. it was interesting yesterday. I got my windows tinted. it looks okay...not dark at all. After chilling w/ keaton in town we went to her house and then guess who called me... i heard the ringer and i knew.........it was kyle. shocked i was! He asked me when I wanted my cds...so, I told him I'd meet him @ J&E.
It was so weird sitting in the same car w/ him finding my cds. it felt fake. He talked to me in school today when I was leaving. That was weird too. Anyways, me and him talked about some things. And I'm glad I got somethings off my chest. Then I called do anything the rest of the day. It wasn't bad though. I did a little studying and played w/ my doggy "ROXY".
I rode w/ Kyle to school this morining it was weird. Everyone was wondering what was going on. Me & Seth broke up last night. He lied to me about things he went off and hung out w/ Brock and did stuff and that made me mad. I hate liars. His mom called me soOoO many times looking for him. Now he*s probably so mad kuz I told her where he was. & gave her the number. Bekuz she was going to call the cops. He left the house w/o telling his parents where he was going and they were really worried. He's probably in BIG trouble.
Today I'm going to work. I have 2marrow off! Yaya!*:) |
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| the little things you do that make me smile....:) |
[Feb. 2nd, 2005|08:05 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | awake | ] |
yesterday was a good day. School was fine. :) I had to work yesterday. It wasn't bad. Melissa B. got her hair cut! it's cute:) I was suppose to get my windows tinted after school. but the guy was really busy and i had to reschedule. it sucked. kuz i was so exicted. ooops on my last entry i said seth gets his lincenses thursday and its actuallly today.
yaya:)i hope he gets it! I'm feeling a little better today. I still feel sick.
This morining coming to school TK was in front of me and he got a ticket:S
I can't wait for this weekend....it consist of working, Seth, Melissa R., family & superbowl! :) yaya! tons of fun!! |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 1st, 2005|08:35 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | sick | ] |
my weekend was okay. I didn't go to school friday bekuz I was sick. So, I stayed home and helped mom around the house. She paid me $50 to wash my own clothes. it was nice. i'm glad she got her tax check back. I hung out w/ Seth over the weekend. And some bitches had something to say about us. HAHA! i love it. thank you guys for caring about me so much to be in my business. yall know who u are. two faced asses. hahaha. but just to let you know it don't bother me. your nothing. you mean nothing and to me u matter NONE!
well, back to my weekend. I hung out w/ Melissa R. that's my damn girl. i love her! we have gotten so much closer. I was suppose to go to Jerel's thing Sat. But I had to work late and I went to see Seth at his dad's after work and then I got lost trying to find Jerel's. I met some guys at Little Casear's. There cool. Today I'm getting my windows tinted. yaya! I have to work today too. I thought I had the day off...and me and melissa & seth made plans but we*ll just have to chill another day. The only days I have off is thursday and saturday. I requested saturday off so me and seth could chill all day!:) thursday he gets his lincenses:D
I finished my little hello kitty valentine's im giving some out in school today. And the rest out a little bit later. I'm early I know!:) |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 27th, 2005|08:49 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | mellow | ] |
yesterday consist of dropping casey and katie off at grandy to get the car...and dropping j.clark off at home. then I met up w/ Casey & Katie and taco bell. yum*yum. Then we went to Muddy*s and met up w/ Joe W. I haven't seen him in a while. He looked really good in that sweater:) Then Casey and I went to wal*mart. She got some v*day cards. I was going to get some but I left my money @ muddy's. After hanging out w/ Casey. Mom called and told me she was in town. So, I met up w/ her @ Radio Shack. She got a $400 dollar phone! I mean damn!!! She got her tax check back. She told me she'd pay for my goat for 4*H and she gave me $50!! yay. Then Seth called and I went and picked him up. We went to his dad's. It was fun. We talked about things. Things seem fine w/ us. Then we went to the mall. I was looking for jeans. Of course I didn't find any. I'm too picky! But o*well!
Then I took Seth home. And we looked at some pictures. And I left. I met up w/ Margie, Amanda A., Melissa B., and Karly after that. We chilled for a little bit. And then I headed home. I got home and played w/ my mom's phone. I love it. It's so cute. I downloaded her some songs as I talked to Seth on the phone. Keaton called me later on and we had a nice little chat about things. Then I went to bed.
Today is going okay...I'm tried. I have to work today...and 2marrow....and the next day. After school I'm going tanning. I need it. I haven't really been lately. Then I might head to wal*mart and then off to work!:) |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 26th, 2005|08:01 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | good | ] |
i haven't written in a while kuz i've been busy. But lately all of done is work, hang out w/ seth, and my friends.
Yesterday I had to work and it was okay. Eric came in and visited me. And I left w/ him. We haven't hung out in forever. We just drove around town and then we went to his house for a little bit. I almost fell alseep watching tv w/ him. I was so TRIED!:)
Then I went back to get my car and Jerel was there.... and I talked to him for a minute...then I left.
I called to get my sun glasses from kyle this morining and all I said was "Can you tell Kyle to bring my sunglasses" and his mom was like "I'll bring them to you I don't want him talking to you"....
Okay... i love how this all comes back on me. HAHA! I'm the bad person. I MAKE Kyle hit me. He can control himself. Anyways... I gotta go. I really haven't been worrying about him and I don't want to start thinking of all that shit. Well, g2g do work! LaTeR** |
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